Fairwell 2011

Starting this blog has by far been my highlight of 2011. What started as a joke has become one of the best things I have ever done and it is thanks to you all who are taking the time to read and support me along the way. There is still a long way to go.....probably a lot of months in my overdraft and some occasions when I wonder why on earth I am putting myself through this?!?...(note read my post 'the reason behind it all' if I feel that way!)

2012 is shaping up to be an equally exciting year as I tick off the rest of the tasks. The blog is also continuing to gain media interest, after featuring in the Express & Star I am overwhelmed to have a piece in the next issue of Company magazine and also on their website.

New year is always a time for reflection, for some it will be a year they would rather forget, others their best year to date. No matter what 2011 has meant to you I hope 2012 is your year of happiness, remember only you hold the power to make it that way. I made the enormous decision to leave my job in November, meaning I have no idea (literally) what 2012 will bring February onwards. It is scary/exciting times- some may say insane but sometimes you need to put yourself in that position to let life take you in a different direction. This year I really found out the person I am and more importantly the person I want to become. I realised that I am too superstitious, never allowing myself to enjoy the moment in case it all goes horribly wrong- there's a resolution for the new year!

So perhaps when thinking of your resolutions have a read through the past post's and hopefully it will give you a little inspiration for something to achieve in 2012?

Please continue to support my list of things to do where possible. There is a facebook page under '23 things to do before 23' that you can join, follow me on twitter @thegracecollins and also email me at grace.collins@live.co.uk

Have a great New Year everybody whatever you have planned and see you in 2012! X

I cannot promise that your year is going to end like this but it is a pretty amazing photo of Oliver's favourite place!

Task 15: A very different Christmas

It is 4pm on Christmas day and I am just settling down to unwrap my presents. Normally by this time I have opened every gift, battling indigestion and preparing for an afternoon nap before attempting to play card games with the grandparents. This year however is slightly different, by 10am I was at a local nursing home volunteering and helping with their very special day. The care home deals with physical disabilities and I don't think I was prepared for the people I was going to meet. On what could of been such a difficult day I have never felt such a positive and welcoming atmosphere. All the carers were so enthusiastic in ensuring the residents had as festive a day just like anybody else and the home was decorated with your usual Christmas trees and also in birthday decorations for a lovely resident who turned 60 today.

I was honoured to meet every resident as they all got ready for their Christmas dinner, whilst each had a different disability they all shared the same cheeky personality and heart warming smile. Not all could speak well but that smile could speak a million words with how much it meant to be able to celebrate Christmas. Throughout the 4 hours there were highs and lows, one moment of laughter could be met with floods of tears and I am not going to lie and say I found it easy. I have a new found respect for any carer who have the patience and kindness to do this everyday and I think a lot of people do not appreciate the work they do. I truly appreciate being able to surround myself with family every Christmas but for some a carer is the only face they will see today.

There was one gentleman in particular that was very special, when having a discussion about the make-up I wore and presenting yourself he assured me 'beauty is only skin deep'. I havent forgotten this and found this so profound- I soon remembered that the way I dress or do my hair will not make me a better person. It is what is on the inside that counts and all the people I met today are truly beautiful inside and out.

I hope in the time I spent there I was able to make some difference to their Christmas- even with washing up not being my strong point!! All evening I have thought about what they are all up to, which is a refreshing change from wondering what my next facebook status should be or watching eastenders Christmas special. I was privileged to spend time at the home and will definitely be returning to visit them all again. I urge everybody to take one day out of 2012 to volunteer and perhaps give their lives a little perspective that so many of us need.

Wishing you all a Merry Christmas and thank you for reading X



My amazing family- a lovely personalised Chritmas decoration from our neighbours



Spare a thought..

Grief is unique to each and every person. Everybody deals with grief differently and at different times, there is no right or wrong way. Before my brother Oliver passed away I had never experience losing someone close to me, in fact I had never even been to a funeral. Personally I was extremely private with my grief, on my bad days I would want to be alone and rarely would want people to see me cry, to this day I do not like people to see me cry. Other members of my family would want to be surrounded by close friends and family, others would want to try to carry on as normal. It was definitely a testing time for my rock solid family- prior to losing Oliver we were invincible and probably took for granted how lucky we were to be so close and to enjoy such happy family memories. I am pleased to say we all stuck through every knock together and could never of survived those times without each other, we still continue to support each other every day. We will never be the same again and every family occasion is overshadowed by the people missing but we will always unite in their memory as they would of wanted us to.

Christmas is an extremely sensitive time of year. Not everybody is fortunate to have families they can turn to, and this is the point I want to make in this blog entry. Whilst my blog is intended to bring much laughter and inspiration, please also spare a thought for those who may be finding this time of year extremely difficult. For some it may be their first year without a loved one, for others it may be their fifth, tenth.. Just because someone is not vocal about their sadness does not mean it is not there. So if you know someone who will be missing someone at this time of year, or who may not have many people to talk to -send a card, pop in to see them, write a letter.. You have no idea how much the simplest gesture can mean to someone who thinks no-one remembers.

Throughout my blog I will be supporting different charities as well as my main charity CRY. I would like to bring your attention to the charity TCF- The Compassionate Friends.

TCF is a charitable organisation supporting bereaved parents, siblings and grandparents following the death of a child/children. They are passionate in supporting others through forums, meetings and sharing memories. TCF has been such great support to Oliver's Dad Shaun he is now a trustee and set up the Birmingham group.

Please take a moment to have a read of their website http://www.tcf.org.uk/ and any donations would be appreciated.

Thank you for taking the time to read this blog, I hope you all have a lovely Christmas as I intend to - raising a glass to my very special Brother Oliver and Grandad George. Both missed everyday and never forgotten.

I will be back soon with the next of my challenges xx



Oliver (left) and his best mate Steve 'Phippsy' before their Christmas day pint